Motherhood Beckons: Farewell for Now

It has taken me a long time to find the right words to speak my business out of existence, at least for now. I have been at this — photography — for a long time. Really, it was my first baby. My first real creation. My first inkling that I was good at something. That I could foster something, nurture it, and breathe life into it. And through that work I’ve been able to help so many people. Believe me when I say it’s not easy to say goodbye to my clients and to my professional work. But it is necessary. 

Love and Marriage

Around the same time I picked up my first camera I met the man who would become my husband. I fell in love in all the most beautiful, comical, and absurdly rom-com ways. But that’s a story for another blog, another day. 

As my husband and I began to build a life together, we were each also building our own businesses. However, because raising our children ourselves was a top priority for us, his career necessarily took on greater prominence, so I could focus on our son when he was born. 

Very shortly (Very, very shortly) after our first child was born, we bought our lovely little farmhouse here in the Rogue Valley and we welcomed a daughter into our home. Then our third daughter joined us. And, finally, our littlest man, the baby of the family. 

Along the way, I’ve formed relationships with clients, established connections with local businesses, and made many friends in the photography business and beyond. Thanks to an incredibly supportive husband and father, I have been able to balance work and family.

I would schedule photo sessions for days when he was home, edit late at night while the kids slept, and fit in time for my marriage, friends, and family, in the in-between spaces of it all. Was I exhausted? Yes. Almost always. But, of course, I chalked that up to being a mother of two, then three, then four, with a husband working more than full time and traveling frequently for work.

To add one more layer on this cake of love and marriage, we decided to homeschool our kids as our oldest would have been entering kindergarten right as the pandemic shut the world down. Keeping the kids home felt like the most natural decision we’ve ever made. 

And while I don’t regret it for a second, it has contributed to an energy of endless movement, action, and purpose in our lives. Truly. Endless. 

I would never call my life “so busy!” I would say my life was full. And it was full of all the wonderful aspects I chose to fill it with. But lately, that feeling has changed. 

So Busy!

Since the birth of my fourth child, life has begun to catch up with me. Whereas before, I always felt like my cup was running over, now I feel like I’m struggling to keep my head above water. I find myself having to remind myself to breathe, and often at the most inopportune moments. 

I love my work. I always have. And so I have spent the last two years working overtime to recapture the joy I had always felt before. I’ve expanded my business in new ways. I’ve met new people in my business and formed partnerships. I’ve taken on the most beautiful projects. And it’s all been so enchanting, really. 

But still. 

I’ve spun myself in circles, and I’m realizing now that it’s all been to try to prove that I’m the same woman that I was when I first picked up a camera, single, with a hot boyfriend and no children. But I’m not that girl anymore. And I’m finally coming to terms with the fact that I don’t want to be her anymore. 

I love her. I will always love her. She is the reason I am who I am today. And I love this version of myself. 

But I’m also not really sure how I fit into this new version of myself. Wife. Mother of four kids under 10. Daughter. Sister. Friend. Lover. Confidant. Citizen. Woman. 

I’ve been so busy proving myself that I haven’t spent enough time just loving myself. Just loving my husband. Just loving my kids. Just loving my life. 

It’s “Just” a Phase

In many ways, I think this phase is a natural one for most women in similar situations. We are the multitasking heroes of our families. We’ve been told we can do it all. And because we can, we should.

But I would argue, finally, now, that just because we can, doesn’t mean we should. The whole point of having all these choices is to make choices. And while I have loved being immersed in the world of photography, and I am so grateful to my career and all of my clients for what you have given me, it is a part of my life I need to let go of. 

I have been so busy saying yes to everything I have ever wanted in life that I forgot to say no to some things so I can actually take the time to appreciate my life. 

So, at least for now, I am saying no to photography as a profession so that I can say yes to my kids, yes to my husband, yes to this life I have created, and yes to myself. 

Is it just a phase? Maybe. But, I think most of the different times of our lives are “just” phases. We pass through, we grow, we learn some things, and we move into the next phase.

I’m looking forward to doing just that. To learning more about myself, about where I am right now, about this time of my life. I am looking forward to slower days, restful nights, early morning snuggles, dates with my husband, and immersing myself in motherhood and the domestic bliss so many of us seek but seem incapable of finding. 

I read recently about how so many of us are stretched tight, stretched too thin, and we keep saying we’re “fine.” 

Well, I’m saying no to being fine. 

I want more. More for myself, more for my kids, more for my husband, more for everyone I love. 

And more for you. 

Because we deserve it. 

Farewell for Now

You can bet I’ll still be taking a million pictures of my own family, my own life. And I have every intention of returning to my photography business after a sabbatical of about a year. I also have no doubt that whatever shape my business takes when I return, it will be new, fresh, and relevant to where I am in life at that time. 

But for now, I’m embracing the unknown, throwing myself into the mystery of motherhood, and encouraging anyone and everyone reading this to do the same. 

Sit with yourself and figure out what you need to say no to, so that you can bring more rest, more peace, more joy, and more you into your life. 

Farewell for now, my amazing readers, my wonderful clients. If you need a referral, I am happy to give you the names of some of my favorite photographers here in the valley. Please feel free to reach out. 

The Value of a Photo Album

I have thousands, no, probably tens of thousands, of photos saved in my phone, on my computer, and on memory cards around my house and shop. And I’m sure you’ve got the same, even if you’re not a professional photographer. 

I think back to the time when my mom took photos of me and my siblings, and she had rolls of film stacked away in drawers to be developed at some future, undetermined time. 

And I wonder if we’re not the same. 

Sure, I can pull out my phone or pull up the photos on the computer and scroll to look at past pictures, but there’s nothing quite like paging through a photo album for concrete memories. 

So, today I’m here to encourage you to print your photos out. 

I know you’re busy. We all are. But scroll through your photos a few hundred at a time and start creating an online folder to be printed out. 

Slowly but surely, you can start getting hard copies of your pictures in your hands, and you can start putting them in physical photo albums. 

Why? 

Have you ever sat and looked through photo albums of your parents, grandparents, and other extended family members? It’s a priceless feeling, and if we don’t create physical photo albums, we’re not passing this feeling onto our own children and the generations that come after them. 

So let this be your sign to start creating that folder, printing out photos, and creating physical photo albums to store away your memories for years to come. 

Are you ready to book your next photo shoot? Contact me today and let’s get started!

Why Hire a Photographer

The world is increasingly returning to DIY, reclaiming old items, refurbishing antiques, and repurposing things that would otherwise end up in a landfill. And to be quite honest, I love it. I love that I see more people wanting to live a slow, more purposeful life that isn’t focused on material things or how much money you can spend to look cool. 

At the same time, I believe there is real value in hiring professionals to perform certain tasks. For example, no matter how brilliant and capable my husband is around the house, we both agree that he should never do any electrical work we need done. Electricians are trained and certified to ensure that those wires don’t short and blow up my house!

The same goes for many other professions, like lawyers, doctors, and pilots. 

And while you may recognize the necessity of having an expert help you with these areas of your life, it’s important you also realize what a difference hiring an expert in the creative side of life makes, too. Those of us in the arts — writing, graphic design, drawing or painting, making music, and, yes, photography — bring something extra to the table that you just can’t quite get when you do it yourself.

The Equipment 

This one is huge. Photographers have tons of expensive equipment that will capture images in ways a smartphone or even a basic digital camera cannot quite pick up. 

Indeed, equipment is a good enough reason all by itself to hire a professional to do a job for you. After all, you may be able to climb up into your trees and chop down dead branches, but do you have the equipment to get you up there, keep you up there safely while you’re working a chainsaw, and then break down all the dead branches and debris in the end? 

A photographer has a wide variety of lenses, flashbulbs, a tripod, a memory card, camera bags, and, of course, a computer to run through all the post-production involved in preparing your photos for you. 

High Quality Images

You might take amazing photos with your smartphone. After all, they’re getting better and better. 

But no matter how smart your smartphone is, it will never produce the high quality images you can get from a professional photographer using high-value equipment. 

In my work, I use different cameras to capture different locations, feelings, moods, lighting, times of day, seasons, and so much more. 

And because of that equipment, the image quality comes out looking… well… professional. 

The Guidance You’ll Get

Okay, so let’s say you’re invested in photographing your friends and family, so you buy the equipment, you learn to get the images, and you’re killing it! What do you need to hire a photographer for? 

The guidance. 

I’ve been in the business for more than ten years now. I've photographed newborns, expecting moms, engaged couples, weddings, birthday parties, headshots, high school seniors, you name it. 

If it can be captured with a camera, I’ve shot it. 

And I still hire a professional photographer to take pictures of me and my family. 

Why? 

First, because I can’t very well be in the picture and take the picture at the same time. A timer can only capture so much. 

Second, and more importantly, a professional will guide me through the process, taking me and my family through poses, candids, and everything in between. 

And that’s what we’ll do for you. 

It’s All About You

Because, in the end, it’s all about you. 

When you go to the salon to get a manicure and pedicure or a haircut and color, you’re the client. It’s all about you, what you want, and bringing your vision to life. 

When you book a massage, it’s all about you. 

When you hire a writer for your website or blog, it’s all about you. 

Are you picking up the pattern here? 

When you hire a professional photographer, it’s all about us breathing life into your vision. You are the client, the center of everything, and you deserve to be treated that way. 

You Get Her Expertise

Last but certainly not least, you hire a professional photographer for her expertise. 

As I’ve said, I’ve been a professional photographer for over a decade, and that experience comes with lots of mistakes and failures that have led to my expertise. You can’t get that overnight, from a single class, or even with a great camera. 

An expert understands how to use lighting to her advantage, how to shoot different angles, how to capture emotions, and how to turn a moment into a memory. 

Ultimately, you hire a professional photographer to be the professional in the situation so you can be the client. A lot of my clients are women, and I know as well as any woman that we wear many hats and we want to manage everything. I love that for us. But I also want us to be able to relax and be taken care of for a change. 

That’s my job. Yes, I have the fancy equipment, I’ll produce high quality images, and I’ll guide you through the process, but in the end, I’m here to make you feel good about the process, both in the moment, and afterwards, when you get that album of photos, of memories, that will last a lifetime. 

Are you ready to book your next photo shoot? Contact me today and let’s get started!